


Cooking Lesson (Undertale inspired)

by MusicAndGoodBooks



Category: Game Grumps, Undertale
Genre: Enemies to Lovers, Innocent, Inspired By Undertale, Kissing, M/M, a brief suggestive joke at the end but that's it, this is garbage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 10:47:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25349446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MusicAndGoodBooks/pseuds/MusicAndGoodBooks
Summary: Ross convinces Barry to join him at Brian's for his cooking lesson, and then conveniently disappears. Heavily inspired by Undertale, but has nothing to do with ACTUAL Undertale, and NONE OF THE CHARACTERS ARE UNDERAGE, KTHNKSBAI!
Relationships: Barry Kramer/Brian Wecht
Kudos: 3





	Cooking Lesson (Undertale inspired)

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, I'm finally back! I know this is total garbage but I just wrote something quick to get back into it. I've got something bigger planned in the future, I hope. But for now, you have to deal with this shit I wrote to get over writer's block.  
> I'm such a sucker for Brian/Barry. Sorry, not sorry.
> 
> Please let me know if you find any mistakes, or have any critiques (besides "oh god, my eyes, don't write anymore!"). My eyes are the only ones that have viewed this hell thus far :3

“We should all hang out sometime,” Ross suggests. “Like, maybe today. Like, right now.”  
“I don’t know, Ross. Brian kinda hates me.”  
“He doesn’t hate you, he just doesn’t know you yet. And besides, I’ll be there. Nothing bad can happen if I’m there, right?”  
“Uh…” I don’t have a chance to finish the thought, Ross is dragging me to Brian’s house. I am terrified.  
Brian’s place is shaped like an angry fish. An odd design choice, but nothing really surprises me with Brian anymore.  
“Hey, Brian!” Ross says in a sickeningly sweet voice. “I’m here for my cooking lesson. I also brought a friend!” He steps out of the way, revealing me to Brian, and for a moment I fear for my life.  
“Human!” He roars. “I mean, Barry! I don’t think of you as a real person in my everyday life, but I suppose . . . if Ross thinks it’s necessary for you to join us for his cooking lesson, I guess I have no other option. I’ll try to remember your name, but forgive me if I can’t be bothered. Come in, come in!” Brian steps aside and lets us inside.  
A few awkward minutes pass, and then Ross says, “Sorry, I just remembered, I have a doctor’s appointment. At the dentist’s.” And hurries out the door, leaving Brian and I alone, unattended.  
I feel about seventy shades of uneasy right now.  
“Well, if Ross isn’t here, you can just leave.” Brian says, and at that moment, Ross pops back through the door. I have no doubt he was listening with his ear pressed to the door.  
“It seems I’ve made a mistake. I thought Brian could be friends with you, Barry, but apparently I was wrong. I was stupid to think he could open his heart to a kind, sweet guy like you. Let’s go.”  
“No!” Brian steps between me and Ross. “I can be friends with any person I choose. In fact, we won’t just be friends. We will be best friends.”  
“Great! Gotta go!” Ross leaves again, shutting the door with such finality, I think I’m going to die today.  
Brian, especially when dressed as Ninja Brian, has a not-so-nice reputation. Thankfully, he’s just dressed like regular Brian right now.  
“Sit down.” It’s not a suggestion, it’s a command.  
I do as I’m told.  
“What do you want to drink? No, don’t answer that. I’ll make you tea. Everybody likes tea.”  
“I’m more of a coffee drinker myself.”  
“Too bad.”  
Brian makes me tea and sits down at the table across from me.  
I take a deep, shaky breath. “So, I realize we barely know each other. Tell me about yourself?” I busy myself with stirring too much sugar into my cup.  
“What do you want to know? I play music with Danny, and occasionally I play games with Arin or Ross for their stupid YouTube channel. It’s a living.”  
“That makes sense.”  
“Ross is horrible at everything, and so incredibly annoying. But he’s a good kid. I’m trying to teach him to cook so that when YouTube inevitably goes to shit, he has something to do.” He pauses. “Shit, I just realized since Ross isn’t here for his lesson, I’ll have to teach you instead.”  
“Oh no, that’s okay.”  
“I’m not going to let good pasta go to waste. Come on.” He grabs my hand and practically yanks me up from the table.  
He goes to his bedroom to change into his ninja costume, an unnecessary and terrifying change, but he steps behind me and starts gesturing to cupboards.  
I try my best to follow his non-instructions. We wait for the water to boil and he pours way too much salt in the water. I get the feeling that he’s not the kind of guy to do things “half-way”.  
My suspicions are confirmed when I go to put the noodles in, and he grunts and shoves me out of the way, pushing the noodles right into the hot, boiling water with his bare hands.  
He “shows” me how to make sauce next, without words, only glares and hand gestures.  
He hands me a wooden spoon next, and I try to stir at the sauce I’ve created, but am met with more disapproval from him. He shoves me out of the way again and starts stirring with fury, and the sauce starts to burn.  
“Brian. You gotta--”  
He glares at me and continues, and the pot starts to melt and the house fills with smoke. It smells horrible.  
“Brian, come on, man, you gotta stop. We should--” I’m cut off by the smoke turning to full on flames. “Shit, we gotta get out of here.” I grab his hand, despite myself, and try to drag him out of the house. At first he resists, but then seems to grasp the gravity of the situation and follows me.  
When we get outside we call 911, and he takes off his ninja mask. “Uh, that didn’t go exactly how as I planned.”  
“Brian, I’m sorry.”  
“It’s okay.” He seems confused by how the events unfolded. “Goddammit, I failed at being your friend, or teaching you anything, didn’t I?”  
“Relax, it’s okay.”  
He sits down on a hollow log, and I follow suit, and we watch the flames, as we wait for emergency services to show up.  
I put my hand on his back, still a little afraid, but trying to be comforting.  
“Hey, at least we got out of there.” I say to break the silence.  
“We did.” He confirms, sounding kinda defeated.  
“You wanna punch me in the face? Would that make you feel better?”  
“On a regular day, yes. But today? Today, I just don’t feel like it.”  
I’m surprised but grateful.  
He turns to me, bluish grey eyes searching mine. “If we can’t be friends, what does that mean?”  
“I don’t know.” I hum, thinking.  
“You kinda saved my life, you know. I was in shock when it started to burn, and I probably would have just stayed there if you weren’t around. Thank god you’re not Ross or we’d both be dead right now.”  
I laugh because he's totally right. “Well, you’re welcome.”  
“Don’t get cocky, Barry. I still want to gut you most of the time, can't see that changing any time soon.”  
“I wouldn’t expect any less.” I smile at him, but I can’t meet his eyes.  
And then he does something completely unexpected and he kisses me, and against all my better judgment, I kiss him back. His kiss is firm, but not unpleasant in the least. I actually get butterflies, but that just might be the residual fear I still have around Brian. Who knows? This has been an insane day in all respects.  
“That’s for saving my life. I figure it’s better than a punch in the face, from your perspective at least.” Brain says as he pulls away from me. “Not from mine.”  
“Much better.” I agree, and pull him back in by the front of his stupid ninja costume, kissing him again, longer this time, biting at his lower lip and then pulling back when I realize that I am kissing Brian fucking Wecht, who just admitted he wants to gut me literally seconds ago.  
“Okay, okay, Kramer, don’t get carried away.” Brian clicks his tongue, but there’s a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.  
“Holy shit, guys! I was only gone for what, an hour? What the hell happened?” Ross reappears out of seemingly nowhere.  
“We fucked it.” Brian comments nonchalantly, as sirens approach from the distance.  
“Wow. What do you guys say after we deal with the fire department, we head to my house for some real spaghetti?” Ross asks. “I’ll order it, don’t worry. Though I am an excellent cook.” He adds quickly.  
“What about pizza? Pizza sounds safer.” I suggest. “And besides, I don’t want to see another noodle as long as I live.”  
“Not even mine?” Brian jokes.  
“Fuck off.”  
Ross beams, like he’s won the goddamn lottery. “I knew you two could be friends! I just knew it!”


End file.
